How I use my empathic and intuitive skills to work as a coach

Tell us about you. What is your job?

I'm Katarina Matthes and I live with my husband and 2 daughters in Oranienburg near Berlin. I have a coaching practice there and specialize in a method called Emotioncode (after Dr. Bradley Nelson). In doing so, I identify and release emotional baggage of my clients from negative events of the past. In the corporate environment, I use my more than 10 years of experience in startups and corporations and advise managing directors and their executives on topics such as potential development and self-organization. A typical business question is "How can we use our full leadership potential to get better results while becoming a top employer?

 

What have you done so far?

I originally studied business administration in Wismar and Helsinki. After graduating I started a career as a product manager for software products and led a team of 11 people that was responsible for internationalization and advancement of an online fashion shop. In 2014, I did a one-year training as a Systemic Personal and Business Coach (ECA), mainly because I wanted to lead better. After that, I gained part-time coaching experience as a career coach and consultant. Within the company, I switched to the Agile Coach role, helping to build more efficient product development processes and acting as a Business Mentor for Product Managers. Ultimately, I learned that for me, the human being is at the center of everything and that it is my passion to help people develop their full potential. It was very easy for me to connect with the people and I could quickly get to the heart of the problem, but I did not know why for a long time.

How did you learn that you are empathic and highly sensitive and how did you learn how to harness those skills?

In the eyes of others, I had everything you need for a happy life. I was one of the highest paying women in the country in a male dominated industry, I found the partner for life and we have 2 healthy kids and yet I was not happy, was often tired and felt drained quickly. A friend recommended me to seek spiritual counseling and I shied away from that for a long time. I had appointments and cancelled time and  again until I was often sick and especially my voice failed again and again. After I took the step then I learned that I am highly sensitive, coupled with a strong empathy. The cause of my dissatisfaction: I absorb the emotions of others and I had no way to get rid of them. I have then confirmed by various psychological tests, such as the Gallup Strengthsfinder or 16personalities.com.

 

What happend then?

I searched for people who are similar to me and learned how to protect myself. The first thing you can do is imagine a shield, most take a bubble or a ball. For me that worked only partially. What helped me more was to strengthen my body awareness. We do not feel emotions with the mind, but with our hearts. Everyone perceives different sensations in their bodies whe n they feel emotions. There are 60 negative emotions and I can now tell how my body feels when I feel a certain emotion. In addition, I have found that I myself carry emotional baggage with me and that I attract people with similar baggage literally. I have learned how to identify and solve these  emotions from past events with the emotioncode.

How do you identify trapped emotions?

This works reliably with the muscle test from Kinesiology. Kinesiology is often used by chiropractors or naturopaths.  

 

How does the muscle testing work?

Muscle testing is a non-invasive tool that helps us detect imbalances in the body. The science behind it resembles a polygraph test or a polygraph. In a polygraph, a person is connected to sensitive electrodes and asks specific questions. The person's responses produce a specific electrical response in the body that is read and graphed by the machine and shows whether the answers are true or false. This happens on a very fine, tiny scale. The muscles of the body are also affected by this electrical condition, so we can use them to show the same response, only on a more pronounced, larger scale. Each muscle is weakened in a state of incongruity or falsehood, which makes resistance difficult. Conversely, the muscles remain strong and can resist when in a state of congruence or truth. It's nice that muscle testing allows us to access important health information. We just need to know which questions to ask, then put the resistance on a muscle and get our answers.  

 

On which topics can you use the emotion code?

With any blockages that we can not resolve ourselves, e.g. separation pain, cervicalitis, heavy workload, thought carousel, when sporting successes fail, when one feels tired and weak, has fears or sleep disturbances. Entrepreneurs want to remove blockages that prevent them to increase sales or sabotage their success. As well the demand to work on longevity increases. People do sports and eat healthy, but still they don't lose weight or feel emotionally instable. Also a lot of my clients favor coaching with me over classic psychotherapy as the last usually takes more time, shows weak results only and is noticed by their health insurance.

 

You are a mother yourself. Can children become clients as well?

Yes, children are very open for it. I observed that children stop feeling when they start school. My daughter is approaching me by herself, telling me what happened at school and that she thinks she has  a trapped emotion. Emotions are trapped within 90 seconds, if they are not processed, ie physically perceived. Our society does not always provide the right space for emotions. If the boss or teacher humiliates me in front of the assembled crew and I feel like crying, I probably will not cry and the suitcase becomes heavier again. Incidentally, even animals can carry emotional baggage that affects them in everyday life.